Wedding Budget Saving Tip: Why You Should Confirm Your Guests Early in the Wedding Planning Process

If you read enough articles and wedding planning forums about people’s experiences, a common theme you’ll start to see consistently is guests not showing up. Hurt feelings and embarrassment aside, this is costing couples thousands of dollars.

Most people request RSVPs for their wedding a few weeks before the event. However, it is very important that you put feelers out in the beginning of your planning process to understand how likely it is that certain people will be coming to your wedding. Some people have friends and family that would move mountains to attend their wedding, no questions asked. If this is your situation, then this isn’t so much of a concern for you.

Your venue and catering, including alcohol, will require a final headcount no later than a certain date leading up to your wedding. You pay per person, so if someone doesn’t show after you’ve had to submit your final headcount to your vendors, you will be charged for that person regardless. Many venues have a minimum spend, so you may end up having to foot the bill for 100 people even though only 75 attended your wedding. On the flip side of that, you will be charged for any extra people that show up, as well.

When you’re making decisions about a date and location, discuss your plans early on with family and friends to determine how committed people are to attending your event. If it’s unclear or ambiguous, point blank ask people if they are planning to be there. Everyone says they’ll come to a wedding in another city, but when it comes time to request PTO at work and book travel, the tune changes. Be it money, schedule conflicts, or just lack of interest, you don’t want to be saddled with a huge food and beverage invoice when half your guestlist suddenly can’t attend.

If your family or friends are unreliable, it can put a damper on being excited to throw a wedding. We know it’s difficult to see other people’s tribe rally around them no matter what, but know that you’re not alone. Most people don’t have 50 friends. A lot of people aren’t super close with all of their cousins. Especially as we get older, people’s priorities change, they have kids to consider, their expendable income dries up, etc. Whether it’s right or wrong, your wedding may just not make the cut.

Don’t expect flaky people to suddenly show up for you. They won’t. Be smart about your money and don’t get left holding the bag.

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